Category: Uncategorised

Why do I find it so difficult to forgive myself when I make mistakes? I keep going over and over past mistakes and never seem to be able to let them go? We all make errors but somehow I can never forgive myself for mine.

I have wounds that didn’t bleed and never left a mark on my body. Nevertheless they still hurt. They are opened every now and then, today was such a day.

My partners past is none of my business but one guy keeps popping up so now its present. I’m hurting.

107 years ago today you came into the world. You were a fantastic Nan and I miss you and the chats we had so much. You knew all my secrets 😉 XXXXXX

I can no longer cope with everyday life. I need help but those around me seem to need it more. I cant rely on anyone for support when I really need it. I cant see a way out of this, my life is falling apart around me. Career, money, love its all going down the drain.

Depression is with me; its been with me most of my life. When deep episodes happen nobody understands. I’m viewed as being moody, mardy or difficult to put up with. Why does nobody with me now understand that mental illness is a part of my life and try to support me?

Today I celebrated 35 years of employment with a company I once respected. This week has ranked among the hardest I’ve had. Incompetence of staff and contractors, lack of plant and planning and in general a feeling that nobody cares.

I’m tired of being stressed, full of anxiety and sadness. I’m getting to the end of how much more I can cope with and have thought of harming myself the last few days. I keep hearing this will pass but I’m not sure it will. My life seems to be falling apart and I can’t hold it together anymore.

I’ve begun to realise that no matter how much you do for people, no matter how much effort you give it will never be enough. I’ve been giving more than I should lately and on the day I couldn’t give anymore I was met with incredulity. Why does no-one come to help me on days when I’m spent? Why do people expect so much yet give little back in return. I’m beginning to realise its just me alone facing the future.